on time

Truth is just like time it catches up and it just keeps going- Dar Williams (As Cool As I Am)____________________________________________

I'm picking up my living room, and a guy's name comes up amongst the girl's i'm spending the evening with. I smile, and mention-

hey, I used to date him.

The surprise is so apparant on their faces, and I just kind of laugh. I recount all the drama that has led to him in a happy relationship with his current girlfriend, and us as good friends that flirt more then good friends should. He is perhaps the wisest guy I ever let into my head, and almost into my heart. We've strayed from talking as much as we used to- but I still feel like I can tell him anything. He'd always ask me how "Texas" was. He even joked about how he wouldn't bother to learn his name, because he didn't know if I'd actually keep a guy around that long.

That aside, I remember back in January once when I was talking to him about Texas. We stood in the back of the kitchen, rolling silverware and chatting. I told him how things with "Texas" weren't so hot- because it seemed like he didn't want to be with me, and I wasn't sure if there was anything I could do to change his mind. We were quiet and rolled silverware for a moment, as he thought of correct response to what we were discussing.

I once told you that timing was everything-

He glanced up at me, smiling slightly, at the reference to our past.

And I meant it. You can like someone so much your heart hurts to not be with them- but there's nothing you can do about it, because you just can't be with them right then; you have to accept it and walk away. If it's meant to be, the timing will eventually be right.

I sighed, not wanting to listen. That night I sent you a long email, and I managed to prolong your spot in my life by a few months. I wouldn't give up those months...

but I guess I knew all along that he was right. Timing is everything.