on poise

does it scare you that I can be something different than you would it make you feel more comfortable if I wasn't you can't control me and you can't take away from me who I am.- Lifehouse (Quasimodo)
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You have the poise of a senator- you know you're very electable.

A small smile plays on my lips as I look at the boy across the small table from me. I take a sip of my tahitaian vanilla latte as I mule over the words he's told me. Senator huh? Everyone always tells me I was meant for big things. My mind flashes to different moments-

John Ross telling me how disappointed he is that I am staying in Springfield for college- that I'm capable of so much more.

Richard saying he always thought I'd do great things-

and now Colin, sitting across from me, suprised some how that I have "resigned to be a communications major."

I'll still do great things,

I argue. He doesn't seem to deny this, as he drinks his veggie smoothie. I still feel uneasy.

I mean, I'm sure I'll end up getting involved in politics in someway-

I halfheartedly suggest. Why do I always feel like i'm letting people down? I enjoy my evening sitting in a quaint coffee shop catching up with a old friend, but the uneasiness never goes away. What do you want? What can i do? Why can't people accept what I want? It's not everyone. But there's people- there's times when I feel like I must present myself in a particular manner, because I know what they think of me- what they'll think of they see me slip.

I am not perfect, but somehow I grasp to maintain some level of perfection in their eyes.